I'm back in my flat. Bandile drove me here.

Now I'm alone. Totally alone for the first time since losing my mother. I can't help but burst into tears cuddle up to the blankets and just doze off.

I wake up because of the heat and go take a bath. It's almost time to go to work anyway so I stay up and have coffee.

Time for work. I won't lie I didn't miss this but it's a distraction. The day is over quickly and I'm back in my flat alone again.

I cry my eyes out again. I doubt I can ever accept losing Ma. I have to go on though and Hakeem is being so sweet and he always calls me back if he doesn't pick up the first time because he's busy.

I think he's here so much because no one was there for him after

  losing Zendaya.

We talk everyday. He understands me completely but I still don't understand some things about him. I'm visiting him for the first time this year tomorrow. I really can't wait.

He comes around a bit earlier than I thought but it's okay. He comes in and hugs me tight I can't help but cry again in his arms. He says "It's okay baby. It's okay".

 We stand like that for a couple of minutes before I get my stuff and head out.

He tells me we're driving up to Johannesburg for the weekend. I didn't know this I'm excited because I've never been to Joburg. My whole family is in KZN I've never had any reason to go to Joburg. I'm so happy.

We drive up and I'm still up when we get to Montrose. We grab some food at Mugg and Bean. I offer to drive us and he reluctantly agrees.

 I can handle his BMW i8. I know I don't drive much but I have a license so I can drive.

He sits on the passenger seat and looks at me carefully as I do everything and he's even telling me what to do. He seems impressed with my driving judging by him sitting back and allowing me to do my thing.

Our conversation is flowing and he even tells me his grandmother is responding well to Chemotherapy.

I don't know where we're going so I let him drive again just before we reach the city of gold.

This place is beautiful. He pulls up at Sandton Sun and it's amazing!

I've only seen this place on television. He looks at me smile like a child and he holds my hand as we walk in to the suite. I'm in heaven! I don't even want to go anywhere so he allows me to. We just stay indoors until Sunday morning and all we did was order good food and have good sex.

We're driving down after breakfast and I offered to drive again

 when we get to Montrose. He agreed.

We're back to my flat and tired. So we go to bed he'll go home early tomorrow.

Midnight he gets a call and he leaves me in bed tells me his grandmother is worsening for some reason then kisses me and he's off.

I wake up for work and I'm super tired so I call in sick and decide

 to stay in. I try calling Hakeem but he's not answering his phone. I make a drink and have some t.v time. Hakeem calls back finally and tells me his grandmother is stable again and he's sorry he was still working.

I offer to come see her but he says his mother is there and he doesn't want a repeat of the last time and I respect that.

We've been going on dates and visiting each other for 3 more months and his grandmother has been in and out of hospital. I still haven't seen her but I hope I do.

 Today I was at work and I'm tired so I retire to my bed. Hakeem calls me.


Me: Baby?

Hakeem: I've sent an Uber. Please come to the hospital. Me: Is she okay?

Hakeem: She wants to see you. I'm ready too.

Me: You?

Hakeem: Just please come.


He dropped the call. I wonder what he means. Let me freshen up before this Uber comes around.

I'm at the hospital so I call him from the entrance cause I don't know where to go. He says he's coming. He doesn't smile when he sees me. That's odd.

"Hey baby" I say.

"Hey babe. Let's go." He replies.

He's giving me chills again. No smile no hug no talking. He’s

 holding my hand though.

This silence isn't so beautiful.

I keep stealing glances at him.

He opens a door and says there she is.

It's Gogo Gloria! She's lost so much weight and she looks like death

no talking. He’s

 holding my hand though.

This silence isn't so beautiful.

I keep stealing glances at him.

He opens a door and says there she is.

It's Gogo Gloria! She's lost so much weight and she looks like death not trying to be funny. I look at him and I want to ask but I don't. Not here. .She wakes up and looks at me with that smile she always had.

 She then says "I made the two of you meet because I thought he had to see you. He had to meet you. Don't be mad at him but me. I'm sorry I didn't say anything my child. Thank you for coming. I just thought you had to know before this cancer kills me" She keeps coughing and can no longer say any more.

“It's okay gogo. I’m not angry.”

To be honest I’m lying but she’s not okay so...

Hakeem asks me to step outside while he attends to her. A few minutes later he comes out.

 “Why didn't you tell me? It's not like this is a terrible thing? I don't understand why you wouldn't tell me!".

He looks at me and says "MaVezi. I didn't tell you because I didn't know how you'd react. I'm sorry"

I don't believe this guy! I'm leaving.

I'll get my own Uber.

His mother arrives.

She looks at me with tears in her eyes and she looks at him and says "She should leave".

I look at them and go.

Hakeem follows me outside and stops me.

"I'm sorry baby. Between my family and all that stuff I didn't want to make you think I asked you out on instruction by my grandmother. I didn't. I asked you out because I wanted to. I'm sorry really".

I look at him and ask "Do you love me? Or it's just that your grandmother approves?"

He looks hurt.

 My Uber is here.

I leave him standing there.

It's been 2 weeks of ignoring him and even when he's here I don't open for him. I love him but he can't lie to me like this. For 8 whole months? Nah I can't.

Next week is his birthday and I really wish I could do something for him. It's just I need to know he's sorry before forgiving him.

 I'm going to work. I find him standing outside the gate with many balloons and flowers.

He walks towards me and stops a meter away.

He says “I want to get close to you but I can't if you shut me out. I know I'm not one to talk but I'm trying baby. I really am trying. I was wrong. I admit it and I'm sorry. I'm really sorry I didn't tell you".

Who am I kidding? I miss this man "Hakeem I love you. I love you enough to trust you with my life and not just because you're a

 doctor. I'd become a fugitive for you. I'd do anything for you. I want to feel like you love me too"

He looks at me and says "I love you I'd even die for you. Believe me. I'm really sorry. I'm sorry".

I'm crying. I step forward. He steps forward. I step forward again. He steps forward and once more. He's in front of me. He kisses me in the most amazing way ever.

Then releases the balloons and gives me the flowers. He steps back twice and he's on his knees.

"MaVezi. Will you please please marry me?" He asks.

I don't believe it. He can't joke like this. He just can't!

He takes out a beautiful ring and I just cry even more.

"YES!" I shout.

He puts the ring on and picks me up.

He kisses me and says

“Thank you. Thank you so much MaVezi".

I'm getting married! My fiancé is a successful doctor.

He loves me and that's all I need to know.

 I have to call my best friend and my family. I'm going to be Mrs Ngubo!


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