Chapter 25


Loyiso slept as I watched him. I looked at his peaceful face and felt a sense of comfort within me. It had been close to eight months since Loyiso and I started dating and I couldn’t imagine being with any other man. I knew that I could marry him and I hoped he felt the same.

Loyiso woke to me staring down at him. He smiled as he reached out to me.

“What are you doing?” Loyiso asked in his sleepy voice as he stretched his long muscular body.

“Just watching you sleep” I said as I stroked his warm face. Loyiso reached out and pulled me in close to him spooning me from behind. His warm hard body felt good against mine and I felt his manhood growing.

“I love you; you know that?” Loyiso whispered in my ear.

“I love you too” I said.

“Do you really?” Loyiso asked with a concerned tone.

“Of course I do. Why are you saying it like that?” I asked as I turned to look in his eyes.

“I don’t know. It just seems lately you’ve been distant.”

“Distant how?” “Your mind seems like it is somewhere else. That’s all. I just want to make sure that you’re still happy” he said.

I turned my body completely toward Loyiso as he sat up.

“So are you still happy?” Loyiso asked.

“Yes baby I am.” “You sure you still want to be with me?” “Of course I do” I said.

“So there’s you know no other guy?”

A shiver of fear rushed through my body. I sat up and faced Loyiso. He waited patiently for an answer. Loyiso looked like a child innocence and eagerness all wrapped up in one. 

“No there’s no other man” I answered. “You are the only man in my life.” A broad smile crawled across Loyiso’s face as well as a flash of confidence.

“Well you can’t blame a brother for checking” Loyiso said. “We have to do that sometimes you know?”

“Yeah I’m sure – you and that ego of yours” I said in a playful tone. I leaned in and gave Loyiso a kiss on the lips. “So let me ask you a question.” “Okay” he said.

“Would you break up with me if I cheated on you?”

Loyiso was silent; he looked deep in my eyes and then away then back again.

“You haven’t right?”

“No but what if I did would you break up with me?” I asked again.

Loyiso was silent again. He took a deep breath continued to think then 

“Yeah I think I would. It would be hard but I would.”

Then I said something that surprised even myself something I knew I had to get out but couldn’t say directly. “What if I cheated with a girl?” “A girl?” Loyiso repeated. “Yeah.”

I knew I was skating on thin ice but it was too late to turn back; I was already in the middle of the pond. I held my breath waiting for what Loyiso would say.


“Why?” I said as I silently breathed a sigh of relief.

“Because it’s a girl

waiting for what Loyiso would say.


“Why?” I said as I silently breathed a sigh of relief.

“Because it’s a girl and to me that doesn’t seem like cheating.” “Why not?” I asked.

“I don’t know” Loyiso said. “It’s just different. I mean you’re just licking her and she’s just licking you which is kind of hot.”

Loyiso raised his eyebrow and cocked his head to the side. 

“Why are you asking me this? Are you thinking about getting with a girl?”

“I think every woman thinks about it once or twice in her life but not all women act on it” I said. 

“So would you?” he asked.

“Would I what?”

“Act on it. You know get with a girl?”

I paused thinking this could be my “in” the way I could break the news that I was sleeping with Dudu but something was stopping me something I couldn’t explain.


“Well if you wanted to” Loyiso continued “I’d be down with that. I mean two times the fun right?”

I laughed but it was more of a laugh of relief than anything but I also was a little taken aback at my man’s eagerness to get it on with two women. In that moment I thought about what Karabo had said about how every man loved the idea until it became reality.

“Why does every man have that fantasy?” I asked. “Because it’s hot two women together.” “What about two men?” I said.

“Not so hot” Loyiso quickly said.

“Now wait a minute Nay Maps plus Maps Maponyane isn’t a bad thought.”

“No baby that’s just wrong in so many ways” Loyiso said. “Well it depends on who you ask.”

“Is that right?” Loyiso asked as he grabbed me and playfully threw me down on the bed. We began to kiss passionately and then he pulled away. “I’m very happy right now.” “You are?” I asked. 

“Yes because I have a growing company a great home and a beautiful girlfriend” Loyiso said as he kissed on my neck. “I don’t think a man could be any happier right now.” 

As Loyiso kissed every inch of my body I wondered if I had missed my opportunity to come clean and tell Loyiso the truth knowing then where he stood about my being with a woman. 

I thought about it a little more and decided that my being with just any woman was different from my being with a woman he considers his best friend. That is where the hurt and the deceit were being so close to home. I closed my eyes and tried to focus completely on taking in all of Loyiso’s affection but I still couldn’t shake the guilt that came with sleeping with Dudu my man’s best friend.


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