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Trampling along the dusty path l tried to make sense of the last five years of my life.

I had been an intelligent and obedient kid participating in all sports and other extra-curricular activities. My priorities had always been firmly set for success. How then did my life become like this footpath abandoned and forgotten?

One man was to blame my selfish drunk sperm donor and his one act of accidentally killing the chief’s son sealed my fate. 

“Such an act can't go unpunished and for peace to reign in this family you Cloud has to go!”

Those were the exact words that nailed my fate to the wall. All my hard work was to go down the drain just to avoid having a dead man haunt this family for what my father did. My life was now at the mercy of the wind wherever it blew.

My drunk sperm donor because he never deserved the title of father didn't even bother to show remorse at what had happened. Only to readily send me to this prison so he could escape it himself. What behavior was that for a father? I was the only daughter of my father and mother. Proof that she had existed. But father had never acknowledged me nor loved me. Choosing only to hate my very breath for something not in my control to prevent.

At least my stepmother tried to hide her happiness behind fake tears. That was the plus side never being subjected to their and their kids’ verbal abuse. There is only so much 'you are useless' that one can take.


After ten years in this house bearing my sperm donor's two children she still hated me with a passion. Simple reason being that my mother was my father`s true love and step mother's best friend. He might have married her but his heart was buried with my mother. How could that even be my fault? Was l there when they were writing their love story? Did l convince my father to leave my step mother and marry her friend?

No!! And yet l still pay for it.

“But l don’t understand why l have to go to them. Can they not go to the police instead?” l ask no one in particular. All my father’s siblings are seated in my father’s lounge informing me of their decision. I was only fifteen and already life was showing me flames before l was even the legal age.

“Shut up you stupid girl. Even if he did go to the police we still have to cleanse this family otherwise the Chief’s son will trouble us

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bearing my sperm donor's two children she still hated me with a passion. Simple reason being that my mother was my father`s true love and step mother's best friend. He might have married her but his heart was buried with my mother. How could that even be my fault? Was l there when they were writing their love story? Did l convince my father to leave my step mother and marry her friend?

No!! And yet l still pay for it.

“But l don’t understand why l have to go to them. Can they not go to the police instead?” l ask no one in particular. All my father’s siblings are seated in my father’s lounge informing me of their decision. I was only fifteen and already life was showing me flames before l was even the legal age.

“Shut up you stupid girl. Even if he did go to the police we still have to cleanse this family otherwise the Chief’s son will trouble us” uncle Batsi answers harshly.

“There is no way l will run around trying to fix someone’s stupidity when a readily available solution is right in front of us” aunt Cherima says eyeing me hatefully.

“You might as well be useful for something” that comes from my sperm donor.

Honestly his words stopped hurting a long time ago. He is not worth my tears. That goes for the rest of the family too. None of them cared for me at all and to them l am a disposable piece of trash. No one accepted my mother as their daughter in law and by default me. 

If only my mother had lived maybe none of this would have been happening to me. Being given to an unknown family there in the village so l could become their brood mare. All in the name of appeasing a dead man who never had any children. It was the twenty first century and people still believed in that?! Or rather it was sneaky chance to kill two birds. Get my selfish dad out of trouble and get rid of me at the same time. 


The only thing lm grateful is that she was alive long enough to give me a name a piece of herself. Why she decided on Cloud though is anyone’s guess.


I googled my name once hoping to see if maybe it means something deeper. It said my name meant `visible vapor nebula a hazy mist around the stars.` That didn't help me at all so l left it as meaning a huge white fluffy cloud in the sky and leave it at that.  


Such an old stupid tradition was determining my fate and l hated it. Chief's son had died in the hands of my father. As a childless man his spirit would trouble the family until reparations were done. Since l was the only disposal girl they offered me and my virginity. The Chief's family would decide was going to decide who l ended up with. Essentially my life was over.

The wind that seemed to be obsessed with my life blew me into the chief’s household and they treated me well. I initially thought the old man would impregnate me or pass me around the old men but nothing of the sort happened. In fact they treated like a maid. A well looked after maid who deserved respect and care. I was not their family member but the girl that was to replace their son and continue his line. Their treatment was far more understandable than my own family.

Arriving in this household the wind ceased to blow preferring to stay stagnant to watch my silent suffering. No definite future to look forward to or anticipate no reason to be either joyous or excited or afraid. Only existing. For five years l have lived as if l will die here with no purpose and little by little my dreams began to die.

My favorite past time used to be sitting outside and watch all those stars glitter and shine on the world. There was a certain kind of peace that settled in my soul seeing those stars and imagining my mum as one of them. She would shine brightly in happiness watching me go about my life and making use of what l was given. Now it felt more like the stars had more life and purpose than l did and that made me feel more morose.

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Rose 2021-08-04 14:43:12

I re-read the story 2 times it's a great story

Rose 2021-08-04 14:43:05

I re-read the story 2 times it's a great story

Nonku 2021-03-05 16:39:53

Wow 😯 what a beautiful story, it literally took me a couple of hours to read and finish it. U are a good writer, I truly enjoyed the story😍 Now on to the next one!

Mapitsi 2021-02-25 02:13:38

ooh Tariro , ooh Tariro, u are such great writer..I finished both ur books in 2 days and I must say ur the best gift I've had this year on this website.. I will keep checking and hoping for more