1. Kulungile Zidlele 

2. Todd Hlasimla

3. Star Mvandedwa 

4. Ntsika Hlasimla

5. Nomgcwabe Ndengana 

6. Nurse Nomzekelo Vulindlela

7. Notsukumetse Zidlele (Kulungile’s mom) 


My husband and i have been married for ten years can you believe it? A gay marriage survives that long? Oh yeah i am a gay man. I am sure you think i must be old for being married for that long. I am not old I just turned 32 years old and my husband is 35. If that is old then i guess i am. When i was twenty-two i graduated from varsity and i immediately got a job. As you know every closeted gay man their dream is to be independent then come out to their family. Well that was my dream too and i thank God i never came out until i started working because when i told my family they disowned me. I had to move in with my husband who was my boyfriend at the time. We decided to elope and go get married. We didn’t have a wedding. We just went to court and did everything. Like i said we are over thirty which means we are not getting any younger. We need to start having a family and i think we are ready to do that. We have been together for 15 married for 10 years. We should be having children right now. We both have a house and stable jobs. I don’t see why we cannot have children and we already started with that process and i must tell you. It hasn’t been easy but if i say anything right now there won’t be any need to have this journey so because i want you to come with me on this journey with your permission please do allow me to take you through it.

My name is Todd Hlasimla. Join me in this difficult journey i am about to embark with my husband.


Having to listen to your friend vent to you about the awful things he is doing to people who hurt him is a little understandable because he is your friend and since you experience his pain right hand because whenever they are hurt they talk to you and you would see the pain written all over their face to be honest that hurt you too. My friend Kulungile hasn’t been lucky when it comes to love. He would watch us living that experience of love and he would be cheering for us. It was hard for him and when he met his man

to be honest that hurt you too. My friend Kulungile hasn’t been lucky when it comes to love. He would watch us living that experience of love and he would be cheering for us. It was hard for him and when he met his man he told me this one was the one. Because i knew his past and how he couldn’t keep a man i knew that maybe the honeymoon is going to end like it always does with the others but no it kind of didn’t until he moved in with his boyfriend. Before i leave you i have a question for you. Do you think if your friend shares his sinister plans with you to destroy people and succeed in them and you see people hurting because of those sinister actions does that makes you innocent? I will put this question in a simplest way because i don’t want you to go back and read again. If you know someone is doing something bad and you don’t stop them does that makes you an accomplice? Bear in mind this is my friend! When he is angry i am too! We hurt together. Do i think they deserve this? Hell yeah but do i think these kids who are used as pawn in this do deserve this? Absolutely not but what can i do? These people asked for my friend to destroy them and now they are paying the price. It just hurts that i will have to live with this.

My name is Star Mvandedwa i am a 29 years old lesbian. I am a surgeon so you can call me Dr Mvandedwa. Judge me i don’t care but one thing i cannot do is betray a friend who have been hurt and i was always there to witness it. Enough is enough. He can vent to me any day. I am not a therapist but call it doctor patient confidentiality that is why i am not telling.


You know what? Past should stay right there! in the past! Bringing your past to your present or future is just you trying to be unhappy or hurt those who are close to you. Past destroyed me! past changed me and made me someone i don’t recognise! Past made me lose myself and i don’t know who i am anymore. I am angry i am bitter! I suddenly became insecure! You know insecurities don’t just pop up. They either caused by what happened in the past or what the person you are with did to you and in my case… i would rather not say. I want you to figure it out yourself what made me the person that i am today. I don’t like me! this is not me! someone made me this person and i love that person oh and i will love him for the rest of my life and i will make sure he loves me eternally too. Earlier i mentioned past and how holding on to it destroys well guess what? This is not my past i am talking about. I am talking about his past! My boyfriend’s past! If i knew this neighbourhood wasn’t new to him i wouldn’t have agreed to move back here with him i wouldn’t even let him move here on his own but you know what? we are here aren’t we? We already purchased this house well he did and we are not leaving…

Me: Not until i destroy them!

My name is Kulungile Zidlele i am 25 years old lawyer. I am moving from my home town Mqanduli to live with my boyfriend whom you are going to be introduced to pretty soon.


Login to comment To share your opinion