I have a good mind of just acting sick now but that means I won't cash in. Jackson is sitting cross me and looking at me like I'm a piece of meat he seems to be enjoying his breakfast while I'm here drinking champagne like I'm drinking water I've finished a whole bottle and I'm going for the second one now being drunk through the ordeal is much better if alcohol was my think I'd drink like this all the time. He stands up from his seat and walks towards me he stands in front of me then starts touching my breasts he makes me stand up and he sits down then I sit ontop of him. Jackson is very rough so I know I'm in it for the ride.
I'm so frustrated right now because I can't find half of my clothes chances are that they are torn any way where ever they are I can't feel my Lower body and I'm walking around funny while looking for my clothes.
"There you go " Jackson says handing me my top I'm glad that I don't wear a bra I've got very small boobs so I don't see a need
"When will I see you again " he asks when I take the money from the Kitchen counter I don't answer
After fixing my hair and touching up on make up I get into the lift and go outside to get an uber.
I'm standing here impatiently waiting for the uber someone taps my shoulder I turn around to see Mehluli
"Why didn't you go to work? " he asks
"What?" I ask it's not that I didn't hear him I'm just giving him a chance to take back what he just asked who does he think he is
"I've been waiting for you for 3 hours" he says
"What the hell Mehluli are you still following me? " I scream
"You're causing a scene and I don't like it " he says with a straight face
"WHAT DO YOU WANT ? " I scream again
"I said stop freaking screaming at me " he says Now his voice is loud I look at him with so much fear and pity he really needs to get help he's also staring at me I can't read his eyes. After a long staring. Contest I walk away he quickly pulls me by my arm
"You're hurting me " I say his grip is very tight
"Why do you keep doing this ? you don't have to do this anymore I'll take care of you" he says
"I said you're hurting me " I say again
"F* Pearl I told her to leave you alone but she insisted you'd make money for us" he says with one hand touching my face I look at him shocked so he knows his wife's dirty business
"I knew there was something about you the day I laid my eyes on you" he says I try yanking my arms but he tightens the grip
"LISTEN to me me " he shouts
"I can't stand seeing you with them anymore you're mine and you've always been mine " he says he's now looking scary his eyes are burning with anger and hatred it looks like he wants to kill someone
"Leave me alone Mehluli you and your wife gambled with my life I was young promoting was innocent until I met the witch you call a wife I hope you too burn in hell" I say biting his hand but he doesn't let go.
There are quite a few people walking up and down around us but all of them are minding their own business none of them can see that something is wrong I'm sure they can but this is Johannesburg and everyone is for themselves. He looks at me and doesn't respond instead tears run down his cheeks
"I don't want to see you ever again and I certainly don't love you " I say
"Don't say that" he says in a low voice
"Don't say that" he says again he wipes his tears then I quickly yank my arm off and walk to the metre taxi I ask the driver to quickly lock the doors I tell him where I'm going then he drives off
My phone vibrates indicating a message come through
*I need you tonight *
* Its Monday Linda I don't do Mondays *
"Thank you " I say to the driver when I get off
It's 2:30pm meaning Phila is back from school I have a lot of explaining to do as to why I'm wearing a short dress heels so much make up and have a weave on on a Monday. I have an afro when I comb and style during the week wigs are for hustling I hardly wear any make up during the week. I greet the security guards
"Hi Miss Pam Mike was here looking for you " one of them says
"Did he says what's up? I wonder why he didn't call me " I ask
"He said he lost his phone that's why he couldn't call he said we should give you this " he says handing me the biggest bunch of roses chocolate and a card.
"Thank you Peter " I say then I continue walking to the flat great Phila is in his room I place the roses on the Kitchen counter and rush to my room to change before he sees me and puts me under interrogation. I try dialing Mike's number but it goes straight to voice mail I don't know why I'm sad I just think there is something more to Mike buying me flowers
I get dressed in a sweat pants crop top and slippers then I go to the Kitchen to start with cooking Phila walks into the Kitchen a few minutes later
"Sissy " he says
"Hey big guy how was school? " I ask
"There's a Father's day picnic coming up at school and our Father's should come where is mine sissy? Will he come to the picnic? " he asks I can feel it in his voice that he is really sad he has never asked about his Father he knows that our Mother and grandmother went to heaven.
The honest answer would be 'i don't know ' but now I can't say that to a 10 year old he won't understand everything is perfect in their world
"Come sit here " I say picking him up to sit on the counter
"You know where Mom and Gran are right?" I ask
"Yes in heaven " he says
"Mom told me that your dad is also in heaven " I say
"But why do they all go to heaven and leave us here alone ? I also want to go to heaven " he says he is really sad
How do I explain this now to him that people in heaven NEVER come back
"Remember what I told you about people who go to heaven?" I ask
"Yes people who are 50 years old " he says I didn't have any other explanation he asked me this question when our Grandmother died he was younger at that time so the whole concept of death wouldn't have made any sense.
"Yes how old are you now?"I ask
"10 years old "he answers
"Exactly so when you're a big man you'll also go to heaven and meet your Father " I say
"Okay" he says I pull him in for a hug
"I love you go and play with your friends so I can cook " I say he jumps off the counter and runs to the door but he stops and looks at me
"I'll ask Kairo's dad to be my dad as well for the picnic cool right sissy ?" He says and runs off again I let out a big sigh I curse the day I met Linda I can't stop Phila him and Linda's child go to the same School and have become close friends I can't tell Phila to stop being friends with Kairo because I sleep with her dad.
I look at the bunch of roses on the counter and I sigh I decide to take the card and read it
'Heyyyyyyy Honeyyyyyy Listen I'm going to keep this short guess what? I finally told the pastor about my status and I told him that I'm never going to become a Pastor Lol he said he has always known that I prefer men than women from a young age I played with girls.
I've met the man of my dreams Pam and he is taking me around the world he's not the age I normally go for but for a 30 year old he is successful and mature. I'll miss you so much I don't know when I'll be back I might not even come back I might get married on the white sands of Thailand.
Pam you're a very beautiful woman intelligent strong loving and you have a good heart trust me I'd marry you any day if I were straight. Phila is very lucky to have a sister like you a sister who'd sell her soul for him. Pam finish your degree make your own money enough money to get out of that life you deserve so much more than what you're setting for please be careful you know how it is out there. Thank you for the friendship and for saving my ass all the time I love you B* stay fresh.
If I had any tears I'd cry I also want to laugh because I can just imagine him saying all of this to me. I'm really sad both my Friends have left Johannesburg Mike is right it's really a juggle out there and without people who have your back its about to get tougher. I slide against the wall until I'm seated on the floor then I stuff my self with chocolate you can never go wrong with lindt. I have a few days off tomorrow so first thing I'll do is to open a new bank account to keep all the money I hustle but for now I think I'll take Linda on his offer.
*Send your driver to pick me up in 2 hours*
I tell Phila that I have to go to Mike's house because he's sick so I'll be back soon.
"Don't open for anyone okay ?" I say to him he nods he's busy playing games on his phone
"Phila " I say to him
"Don't open for anyone okay sissy " he says I kiss him on the head then I leave.
I make a mental note to call the centre tomorrow to hear how Lungelo is doing
"I'm glad you came " Linda says I fake a smile I place my bag on the counter and walk to sit on the couch opposite him he stands and walks to sit next to me
"Where is your wife " I ask he looks down
"She's at her parents " he says
"Alright do you have any champagne here " I ask he stands up then comes back and hands me a bottle I drink from the bottle
"Woah easy what's wrong ?" He asks taking the bottle away from me
"Come " I saying pulling him to me
"Wait I want to talk " he says
"Later come " I say taking his shirt off after several attempts he gives in
"You're on fire "he says while getting dressed I'm already dressed and sitting on the couch waiting for him
"My wife suspects that I'm cheating " he says
"Who are you cheating with ?" I ask
"How can you ask me that Pam I'm cheating with you "he says I chuckle softly
"With me? " I ask laughing
"You're not taking any one of this seriously" he says
"Why should I? you're not cheating with me and you know that now I have to go" I say he looks at me with hands on his waist
"Pam " he says
"What?? Linda you know that we're not an "item" and will never be " I say
"But... " he says
"But nothing I told you what I do why put yourself through so much trauma with thinking we are dating " I say
"Oh and I don't like this friendship between your daughter and my Brother" I say he hands me money then I walk out.
I decide to pass by Capello for a few drinks and their famous ribs I find a table for one. I dial Phila's number it's 7pm now so he's supposed to be getting ready for bed
*Are you coming back ?*
*Almost leave your homework bag on the table and go to sleep *
* Please come and sleep with me *
*Okay see you just now I love you *
"Long Island please " I say to the waitress
I'm enjoy my ribs I'm on the second glass of Long Island I don't know why I'm on the second glass because it's horrible Sibu loved it Maybe that's why I'm gulping it down I really miss her .I really needed this time by myself to think things through I look up to see Jackson walking in with a gorgeous woman this was bound to happen he owns half of the place I'm sure that's his wife they walk to the reserved enclosed area.
"Please pack this up for me and please bring the bill" I say to the waitress passing my table
"There you go the bill has been taken care off " she says I don't even ask I take my parcel and walk outside to get an uber.
I find Phila in the lounge watching Toys 3 for the hundredth time I'm very tipsy so I have to try so hard to hide it.
"Phila" I say my eyes can hardly open
"Are you sick? " he asks
"No why aren't you in bed? " I ask
"I was waiting for you to come back "he says
"Let's go to bed " I say to him he switches off the Tv and the lights then we head to bed
I don't have everything figures out but one thing I know is that I can't afford to lose my job I'm getting ready to go to work Phila has left so I'm alone in the flat. Someone knocks it's 7am so I'm wondering who might it be the knock gets louder and harder
"I'm coming "I shout security calls to ask if they should let the person in but they didn't call yet someone is knocking on my door
"Is he here ?" She shouts the minute I open the door
"Hi Pearl " I say
"Where is my Husband?" She asks
"How should I know ?" I ask I don't know where I'm getting the confidence from Pearl is ruthless she's been my boss so I've seen what she's capable off
"F* Pam where is Mehluli ? I hear he's been following you around like a sick Puppy" she says and chuckles
"You know I thought it's just a stupid crush that he had on you but seems like I was fooling my self it's been Freaken 3 years and he's still obsessed with you " she says she's now angry
"Pearl I'm really sorry but I don't know where your husband is I really need to go to work " I say walking out she's been standing infront of the door
"I'm still talking to you " she says
"What do you want me to say I don't know where is really " I say
"Well he hasn't been home in a week " she says I shrug my shoulders then I walk away leaving her standing in front of the door.
"Who said let that lady in ?"I ask the security guard
"She said she's your friend " he says stuttering
"But did I say let her in?" I ask again
"I'm really sorry Miss Pam she insisted that she's your friend and that it's urgent it won't happen again " he says
"It better not happen again make sure she leaves " I say
During the week I take taxis to work I use Uber during the weekend when I have to go to my other job particularly because they pay for them. I walk to the taxi stop while listening to music I remember that I have to call the centre I dial the number. The nurses are really friendly at that centre they are dedicated to their work that much I can say.
I'm really glad for the good news Lungelo is recovering very well they say he's been discharged from the hospital now I promised to see him soon.
I get to work and everyone is all over me then I remember that I said I was sick so I need to pretend as if I'm recovering I fake smiles for a few minutes in the staff room then I go to my classroom. There's a big welcome back Miss Pam on the board balloons floating and the biggest bunch of flowers on the desk.
"Welcome back Miss Pam " they all shout I stand there is awe I'm so happy I could cry they didn't know that I was coming back so this means this has been here since I told the principal that I'm sick.
I'd say I'm responsible for the grade 4's for now since their class teacher is on maternity leave for the next 4 months. I settle in on the chair and call out the register.
The day is going pretty quick it's the second break Grace has summoned us to the staff room.
"Good day Everyone " she says in her deep voice
"Good morning " we all respond like school kids
"As you all know that our School is a semi-Government therefore we are going to be impacted by the various changes made by the department of education I will be calling each educator to my office to discuss how these changes affect him/her"she says
"Whats the worst case scenario ?" Asks Jake he's not even a Teacher he's the sports coach he comes in 3 times a week.
"I'd be lying if I said I knew Mr Schultz going back to my point the changes might not affect everyone but I will be discussing the circular from the Department of education with everyone" she says
"Anymore questions?"She asks everyone is dead silent
"Meeting dismissed"she says and walks out you can see the concern written on everyone's face.
I get home to an empty house Phila is not here I wonder where he is I dial his number but it goes straight to voice mail I look up to see it in the kitchen counter.
"Peter did Phila come back from school " I ask the security guard
"Not yet Miss Pam" he says I'm panicking now Maybe something happened I decide to call the lady who transports them
*Hi it's Nolwazi I'm calling about Philasande*
*He didn't get on the Khombi this afternoon the other kids said he's playing chess*
*Thank you *
Phila's school is kind of out from town so taxi's don't go there so I request an uber.
" R120 " the guy says I sigh why does everything require money I get off and make my way to the schools reception it's still open great.