sleep a wink I kept on tossing and turning the entire night when I close my eyes his evil smile kept on appearing in my mind everything that happened kept on haunting me .I took my phone and dialled mom's numberbut It went straight to voice mail I dialed nikitas number too and it rang unanswered I sat up straight until it was morning. zama woke up I didn't budgeI just sat there feeling helpless and tears rolling down my cheeks I wasn't going to school I wasn't ready to face the world I even feared to look at myself in the mirrorI felt dirty and ashamed of my life. Zama:"Let's go to school nanathat's where you are going dissappear from this*sitting next to me * one day we are going to expose him. We are going to find someone who is going to help us" I nodded and get up from bed then she accompany me to the bathroom I did all my morning hygiene then went to the bedroom Zama borrowed me her old uniform We bumped to aunt when we were about to walked out. Aunty:"Oh ubuyile? (You are back) suvele uzihambele nje (You are going in and out like it's your house)" I passed her without saying anything Zama held my hand tightly and we walked away but the time we walked out of the gate I fell down and cried I cried like there was no tomorrowmy mother sold me Where was she when I needed her the most? where where was my best friend when I needed her the most? how was I going to face my boyfriend? my fellow school mates ? it was like a dream I wanted someone to pinch me and say wake up Snoxolo I wanted to be told that it was all lies my uncle never raped me.. Zama:"It's gonna be alright *Wiping my tears * get up so we can not be late" I held her as I get up and we walked to school. We arrived at school and the way they were staring me it was like everybody knew. Me:"Everyone is looking at me " Zama:"Relax they know nothing" we entered our first class and sat down Awethu walked in too and took her chair then sat next to me. Awethu:"Chomza waka " I faked a smile Awethu:"Sno are you alright? Your eyes are puffy were you crying ?" I shook my head and could feel tears forming in my eyes. Me:"Am Fine Chomza I just heard that mom is not feeling well so.." Awethu:"Okay I understand chomz" The rest of the day at school was kind helping me I managed to forget about what happened the previous day reality kicked in when the last class was over that when everything came back Zama saw how uneasy I was when we walking back at home I was quite on our way my phone beeped and I took it out of my pocket "Am coming to see you tomorrow I don't understand why you are not answering my calls" that was the massage from Sihle I took a deep breath and replied "You did nothing babe I was busy and I will be still busy tomorrow I will tell you when to come # LoveYou " I pressed send and he immediately call after few seconds. Me:"Babe" Sihle:"Snoxolo I'm coming to see you tomorrow like it or not. This is up to no discussionsiyezwan? (Understood )?" The was no way I was going to argue with Sihle because I knew I wasn't going to win. Me:"Can you do me a favour babe? " Sihle:"Okay bbe What do you want? Me:"Ummh it's my sisters party tomorrow so I was wondering if you could buy us alcohol.." Sihle:"Hayi Sno! forget! you are now drinking alcohol?" Me:"No No it's not for me Babe It's for her friends" Sihle:"Okay..I will do so but promise that you are not going to drink" Me:"I promise" Sihle:"Lemme get back to work Will call you later okay? Uthandwa yimi my chicken lips" Me:"Love you too bunny" he then hung up Zama glanced at me and shook her head.. We arrived at the hell house and no one was home such a relief ..I quickly took off the uniform and wore my jeans..zama did took off hers too...she went through her bags looking for something. Me:"looking for something? " Zama:"Yeep. ..Got it" she handed me a pill. Me:"What am I suppose to do with this." Zama:"Drink it" I went to the kitchen and poured water I swallowed the pill and gulped the water.. I turned around and drop the glass when I found Musa leaning against the door way I started trembling in fear I saw zama coming towards the kitchen and she pushed him aside. Musa:"Am glad you are both here I want you girls to listen to me Wena Zama I heard you last night telling this*pointing at me* what goes down here I hope you did tell not to try any funny business we are going to pretend like non of this happened niyezwa zifebe? (Understood bitches?)" Me:"I wasn't a bitch when you were shoving your big dick on me" Musa:"Watch your tongue !" A hot slap landed on my cheek. Me:"I hate you" my voice my trembling I ran to the bedroom locked the door and cried...I wanted to end my life I went through zama's things and came across with the stack of pills I smiled to myself as the pain was about to fade I was going to be free.