My alarm goes off waking me up. I quickly make my way downstairs to find my family already kneeling ready for our 3 a.m. prayer. I rolled my eyes but proceed to kneel next to my younger sister Lerato. She looks equally annoyed but this is how things have always been in our house.
My father is the Head Pastor at 'The Rock of Power Ministries'. He's not your typical pastor - understanding caring and loving - nope not my father. He is the minister of patriarchy and governs our household with an iron fist. He knows my sister and I are not into this whole church thing but he really doesn’t care in fact he personally makes sure that we are involved in all the church's activities. My older brother Lehasa is his golden egg; he does everything in his being to please my dad. He's to my Dad's choice of a wife and is in the process of completing his Biblical Studies.
It's common knowledge that he is miserable but he tries his level best to put a front and please Dad.
I remember on the day of his wedding he struggled so much with his vows. It was obvious that he so badly wanted to run away but Dad kept telling him how proud he was of him.
Dad: Amen. (He balances himself on my mother’s shoulder as he stands up)
Dad: Today is Saturday and we need to be at the orphanage by 7 a.m. in order to help the Sisters with the kids.
We all nod our heads.
I make my way back to my bedroom to get a few more hours of sleep before we go to the orphanage. I know it's going to be a long day with crying babies and my dad acting like the world's best pastor especially when I know the Devil he really is.
A few hours later Lerato knocks on my door but doesn’t get any reply from me since I’m in deep sleep. She shakes my shoulder and I wake up startled.
Me: Keng ka wena [What’s wrong with you]?
Lerato: You are late you were supposed to wake up at 6:30 and it's now 06:55. Dad is going to be angry with you.
Me: Hai fock maan [No fuck it man]! Nna this life is draining me. I’m a 26-year-old man Lerato I’m supposed to be enjoying life weitsi [you know]? I should be fucking around drinking and having fun like any other young man my age but instead I’m going to orphanages and preaching at Sunday School. Not that there is anything wrong with that but it’s just not my thing. I love partying having sex with women drinking and going out with guys my age.
Lerato: I get that but this is our life Lehumo. Hurry up before Dad hears us; you know how he is.
Me: I’m just tired of all of this. Just because he chose this path it doesn’t mean we have to walk in it too. He is being unfair. I have a degree for heaven’s sake I should be looking for a job instead of teaching these little brats in church.
Dad opens the door and makes his way to my bed.
Dad: (Livid) What did you just say?
Me: Dad this life is not for me.
He grabs me by the neck and lifts up my body. He's a well-built man and his height is a bit intimidating.
Dad: Son I can’t hear you What are you saying?
Not that I can’t take him on but the problem is I sleep naked and now my privates are all exposed. I use my hands to cover my privates out of respect for Lerato. Lerato grabs the towel from the pedestal and covers me. He pins me to the wall and by now I’m struggling to breathe. We are all used to this treatment my mother included but now that I’m a grown man I find it abusive and I’m tired of it.
Dad: Those stinking hairs sticking out of your privates are the ones giving you the nerve to go against my word?
He flips me over making me lay stomach-flat on the bed. He takes the towel off and pulls out his belt.
Dad: Start counting with me.
I clench my jaws and take all the lashes in yep all 20 of them. Lerato watches me all horrified and unable to say anything all 20 of them. Lerato watches me all horrified and unable to say anything because she knows that the tables will quickly turn on her. I stay in that position trying to take in the pain when he pulls Lerato to him and lowers her undies while lifting up her dress. She bends for him because she already knows what is about to happen. This is wrong on so many levels but it has been our life and the only life we are used to. That’s one of the reasons that make me rebel against religion. I mean how do you explain a man of God who preaches His Word and claims to heal the sick but is a different man at home an a abusive man even. He might be able to fool his congregation but I can see through him. He's fraud and knows nothing about God.
Lerato screams with every lash she gets. He gives her ten strokes and my brother and mother walk in as he's going on his 5th one. They both look at her half-naked body as some lashes land on the lips of her entrance. I still don’t understand why they are looking at that horrible scene yet are doing nothing.
Dad: Lerato I’m hitting you because you heard what this fool was saying yet you didn’t pour holy water on him as we all can see he's possessed by the devil.
Lerato: (Pulling her undies up with one hand while the other wipes her tears) I’m sorry Dad it won’t happen again.
Dad: And wena [you] Lehumo you are skating on thin ice.
He leaves the room and my mom rushes to massage Lerato while Lehasa gives me my clothes.
I make my way to the bathroom to rinse my cookie with cold water. It is a bit irritated from all the thrusting it has been through. I kneel on the toilet seat and let my tears flow. I feel so lonely used up and drained. This is the only life I know. Lady Farrah told us that she saved us from an apartment building that caught fire and all our parents died in it. The story doesn’t make sense and every time we try asking a question regarding it she gets angry so we let the matter be.
Life with Lady Farrah has been tough. She always tells us that we owe her our lives and prostitution is our way of repaying her for taking care of us and making sure we get an education.
Growing up under Lady Farrah's care is one of the hardest things one could ever go through. I'm not disputing the fact that this is the only life I know but I know that it is not how life is supposed to be. She lets us use the internet on her happy days and I always go on YouTube to check how other kids were brought up. The internet teaches kids that nobody should force them to have sexual relations and that people have rights. But by the age of 14 she was making us touch these men's private parts and grooming us to be these disgusting things we are today.
The brothel is divided into 3 groups:
1st (West) Wing consists of newbies mostly virgins. It’s at the back of the house and is a bit neat and homey. The west wing is for psychotic men who pay huge amounts of money to sleep with virgins.
2nd (East) Wing consists of prostitutes who were found on the streets the ones whi charge a low rate and have given up on life. Their side is not that fancy and is mainly for low-class customers.
It's the first cottage from the entrance of the house.
Then finally the North Wing. This one is were I'm placed. It's the most beautiful and has high-end furniture. Most of her clients call us the 'Black Diamonds'. They say our privates don’t get tired no matter how much they abuse them. They say our beauty is the most enchanting they’ve ever seen and we know how to dish out orgasms without moving even an inch. We host the most prominent men of this country I'm talking about your politicians celebrities and other public figures. They pay huge amounts of money to sleep with us.
Him: Come here my sweet juice I'm still enjoying that pussy.
I cringe at the sound of his voice. His big belly is overlapping onto the white sheets filling my heart with anger as it shows that he's in his late sixties. This old fool enjoyed his youth and now he wants to ruin mine.
As I make my way to the bed he starts coughing and points to the asthma pump on top of the mini table. I look at him struggling to breathe but my anger won't allow me to save him.
Him: (Struggling to breath) Please heeeeeelp... I have a wife and kids.
Me: Then what are you doing with young girls?
Him: I will stop...
Me: Too late.
I watch him crawling on the floor trying to reach the pump but as soon as he's close enough to grab it I take it and climb on the bed and start spraying it in the air. His face turns blue and his eyes pop out. I wait a good 30 minutes before I call Lady Farrah.
Farrah: He's not dead just check his pulse.
Me: I did and I can’t feel it.
Farrah: lt makes no sense. How can a person have an asthma attack and die while you around?
Me: I was in the bathroom taking a shower.
Farrah: I will look into this matter. For now take all your belongings and leave the hotel. Fumane make sure you don’t leave a trace of yourself.
Me: Yes Lady Farrah I won't.
I leave the hotel without looking back. I am a bit shocked at what I have done but I'm tired of this life! Now I have to think of a way of killing Farrah.