whenever you feel like giving up remind yourself of how far you’ve come from a place you never thought you’d get out of. even tho you might not be where you want to be yet still acknowledge & be proud of the growth you’ve achieved so far. you made it this far don’t give up now .I kept on wiping my lips I didn't want my father to know that someone kissed me..my mother traveled to the city to see her elder brother .I was home with the boys .

where are you coming from " ba mutale asked

I went to see chama off " I said

are you sure " he asked

I nodded

did jack give you the money for school fees " he asked

yes ba mutale " I said

keep it well cause next term I won't be around nowonder I have given you that money in advance " he said

I paid already " I said

OK that good then " he said

my brother looked troubled like he was having a lot of problems ..

ba alfred ( second brother) " I said sitting next to him

yes mwaice (young one)" he said

what's wrong with ba mutale aaii " I asked

what do you mean " he asked .

he looked disturbed " I said

oh that " he said

what's wrong " I asked

he impregnated someone " he said

what " I asked shocked

so he removed someone's pants and have sex with them " I asked

who told you that " he asked surprised

nobody " I said

Jenny I hope you are not practicing that " he said

no ba Alfred am not " I said

good cause if you become pregnant you know dad won't spare you " he said

I didn't even know what sex was

but why is he confused about it is sex that bad?" I asked

Jenny you ask too much questions " he said

ba Alfred tell me" I said

he was charged alot of money for impregnating the girl "he said

but why" I asked

that's tradition when you impregnate someone you are suppose to pay a lot of money " he said

was he having sex alone or was the girl raped for him to be charged " I asked

Jenny go and eat " he said

ba Alfred " I said stamping my leg on the ground I really wanted to hear more about this sex thing .

Jenny go " he said

I went to the kitchen ate my supper and I retired to bed all my siblings ended in 12grade and couldn't further they education ..reason only them and their parents know ..

chama came to pick me up and we went to school .. I narrated the story how it all happened

so how was it " she asked

the same kiss" I asked

she nodded

I didn't like it " I said

really I enjoy being kissed" she said

chama when were you kissed " I asked shocked

remember bwalya that guy from our class " she said

yes " I said

he is my boyfriend " she said

chama you didn't even tell me some" I said

I wanted to but I know you become judgmental and moreover you don't like bwalya " she said

but still you could have told me you are my friend " I said

am sorry madam " she said

I tell you everything " I said

am sorry back to your kiss ' she said

I didn't like it " I said

let him kiss you again but don't let him touch you anywhere " she said

don't know when I will see him again "I said

you can come pick me up at my place I want an excuse to go see bwalya today " she said

but I didn't tell him that I was coming "I said

oh but come to my place and be my passport" she said

fine I will come " I said

we had our classes and knocked off

in the afternoon did my house chores and went to chama's place

when is your mother coming " chama's mother asked

I don't know aunty " I said

when she comes tell her I have nakonde rice and wrappers " she said

okay aunty " I said

let's go " chama said

mummy have stolen her " I said

its fine " she said

thanks love" chama said all happy

sure Mrs bwalya " I said

shout up " chama said

I escorted her and decided to wait for her by the river ..

why are you here alone " a deep voice asked

I looked behind and it was the prince

my prince " I said

how are you " he said

am fine " I said

can I join you " he asked

sure my prince " I said

call me Charles" he said

I smiled

we started chatting he was a comedian

he was a comedian I laughed my lungs out ..

you have pretty eyes " he said

thank you" I said

am inviting you to the palace tomorrow " he said

I wish I can my prince but I can't '' I said

come on " he begged

next time my prince " I said

chama showed up with Philip the prince was holding my hand philip's face changed ..

hey man " the prince said

hey " Philip said 

I have to go now " the prince said pecking my hand

I smiled I could smell smoke coming out of Philip's nose

my girl will talk tomorrow " chama said

okay bye " I said

there was an awkward silence between us I cleared my throat

I wanted to come see you " I said

and you ended up with the prince instead " he said

are you upset with me " I asked

how would you feel when you find me with another woman " he asked

Philip I like you not the prince " I said

I doubt " he said

he was upset you can even tell by the lines popping on his forehead

look prince I mean Philip ..he interrupted me

see you later Jenny " he said

I grabbed his hand

please don't be upset with me " I said

he moved closer

kiss me if you don't want me to be upset with u

here " I said

yes there is no one " he said

OK you kiss me " I said

he leaned over and kissed me

just follow the flow " he said

I didn't even know what he meant by that I just opened my mouth like I was letting bees in ..

jenny relax okay " he said

I nodded

he showed me how to kiss

I wasn't comfortable with it even one bit ...the minute we were done I wiped my lips like no Man's business


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