JOESEPH I heard moans coming from his room plus nigga didnt even go to school.I budged in not caring wether he is busy with his hoe...The bitch was even on top of him.and when she saw me walking in she got off him and into the blanket.. Phil: WTF bro dont you know how to knock? Me: And didnt you teach this hoe of yours to fuck out of my business..Who told her to post such rubbish on facebook. Phil: She what? Me: Dont fucken piss me off wena you know very well what you both did. I went to him and i honestly didnt give a fuck of how busy they were.i punched him and he tried to fight back but he wasnt that strong enough for me right now with the way i was mad pissed.the Valerie girl tried to separate us but i slapped her so hard that she fell on the bed. Me: If you dare try to pull this stunt again and if my Rene doesnt gt over this i swear i will never talk to you. Phil: Just because of a pussy? You sure are more stupid than i thought. Me: It can be a pussy but its one that i love and one that has self respect not this one you just met yesterday and already she is up in your bed riding you..I wonder what Hailey will say when she sees those pics.The same girl you have been trying to apologise to. I turned to look at Valerie Me: As for you hmmm *chuckle* you better count the days you are busy bouncing up and down on top of him because its only a matter of time he shows you his true colours Val: FYI he loves me. Me: Did you just say love? Well you must be dreaming missy..Phil is only tap and go.If he enjoys you he sticks around only for the intimate part. Phil: Get the fuck out of my room dude and stop feeding her with lies. Me: And if i were you i will watch my ass because Hailey will not rest until she kicks that ass and good luck with that. I got out and banged the door when i went out..I will not rest until my girl is okay..My phone rang and it was Nisha. Me: Hi Nisha: Hey can we meet? Me: I dont think i can be able to do that today. Nisha: Please i prepared something special for you. Me: But i wont stay long. Nisha: No problem..Meet me at the Limpopo mall Me: Okay. I wonder what she wants. RENE I kept myself busy with cooking and since gran is okay now she cleaned the house. After cleaning i took a bath and got down to my books.I tried to study but who was i kidding? The books were studying me.I switched on the little radio in my room and there was a certain song that was playing and it was announced that its shawn mendes- mercy.it was a selection hour where as people were selecting a song to be played for them.I lay on my bed and listened to the lyrics of the song (" I'm not asking for a lot Just that you're honest with me My pride is all I got I'm saying baby Please have mercy on me Take it easy on my heart Even though you don't mean to hurt me You keep tearing me apart Would you please have mercy on me I'm a puppet on your strings And even though you got good intentions I need you to set me free Would you please have mercy mercy on my heart Would you please have mercy mercy on my heart") It was totally getting to me..The pain of losing my parents at a young age..the fact that i have to be responsible for my gran..The fact that there is no one who is taking the role of being my parents is straining.My boyfriend is also cheating and lying about it.its like the pain never stops.like im cursed at some point.I have prayed alot but my situation doesnt change.Why does the bad happen to the good ones? How many murderers walk free? How many rapists walk free? But all i asked was to be happy but sorrow keeps occupying my life? I havent cried in a long time.i havent shed a tear because i was tired of them.i was tired of acting as a victim but right now at this moment it was too much to consume.It was alot to just ignore.This is my first heart break from a boy..The first guy i give my heart to puts me through this.whats more to come?..i sat on my bed and cried mercy on my heart") It was totally getting to me..The pain of losing my parents at a young age..the fact that i have to be responsible for my gran..The fact that there is no one who is taking the role of being my parents is straining.My boyfriend is also cheating and lying about it.its like the pain never stops.like im cursed at some point.I have prayed alot but my situation doesnt change.Why does the bad happen to the good ones? How many murderers walk free? How many rapists walk free? But all i asked was to be happy but sorrow keeps occupying my life? I havent cried in a long time.i havent shed a tear because i was tired of them.i was tired of acting as a victim but right now at this moment it was too much to consume.It was alot to just ignore.This is my first heart break from a boy..The first guy i give my heart to puts me through this.whats more to come?..i sat on my bed and criedi let it all out in my silent cry...i wonder why they call this a heartbreak because its like all the parts of my body are broken.. TANISHA I was waiting at Limpopo mall for Joe to arrive and he took his time which made me impatient.i already booked a room for us..When he arrived i gave him a warm hug..he seem to be down somehow. Me: Hey babe.Why are you so down? Joe: Its nothing big.. Me: Okay come i have a surprise for you. I held his hand and we walked to the hotel.When we got there he sat on the bed and looked around. Joe: Whats this? Me: Its a room i booked for us. Joe: For what actually? Me:Im tired of waiting for the right guy.i somehow feel like you are the right guy for me Joe. Joe: Wait a minute are you saying what i think your are saying? Me: Yes..please be my first. Joe: Before you get carried away i have something to say to you. Me: Cant we talk after we do it? Joe: How do you know that after i tell youyou'll change your mind? Please learn to be patient. Me: Oh okay. I somehow felt a storm of heartbreak coming. JOESEPH. I honestly didnt know how to do this.This girl is bubbly and innocent.Yes i like her and i dont want to hurt her.When did it come for me to get caught between two girls.When did i become this kind of a guy.Its better i tell Nisha the truth.If she wants to stay then she will but if not then i know i have my girl to focus on only. Me: Look Nisha i have been meaning to tell you that i have a girlfriend.We have been together for sometime now and i just dont want to play you like this. Nisha: You what? So you lied to me? Me: I never lied to you.i just didnt tell you that part of my life.Look i wont lie and say i dont love her because i do so if you want to break up then its your choice.if not then you gotta know that there are limits in this relationship. Her eyes were full of tears and they threatened to fall anytime..Her innocent face was written hurt..I couldnt help but feel bad..i held her in my arms and she cried even more..By the time she was done crying she had hiccups...I let her be in that position in my arms.She lifted her head and we looked in each other's arms. Nisha: Do you love me? Me: I have one heart Nisha wich can only be given to one person but i like you alot and i wouldnt want to lose you. Nisha: So you dont love me? Me: I will learn to do that when time goes on if you still want to be with me. Nisha: I love you Joe and i wana be with you.Im willing to try to be with you. Me: Thank you babe you wont be dissapointed. We started kissing and the next thing clothes are flying across the room.by the time we realise we were both naked...She handed me a condom.damn this girl came prepared. Me: Are you sure you want to do this? Nisha: Yes im sure. Me: Its gonna hurt worse with the condom though. Nisha: i dont want a child Joe Me: Okay. Honestly its my first time sleeping with a virgin.I always thought Rene will be the only virgin i sleep with since she is the one i intend on keeping besides virgins are a handful.they will be running at a nigga's back saying he broke their virginity.. Well let me see how this goes just as long as Nisha knows her place and will not cause trouble for me.We struggled with Nisha saying it hurts and i had to take it out.this is just some fucked up shit..But after a while we finally managed to get to it and she would still complain but i was getting my pleasure so none of that mattered. * * * We took a shower together and we laid on bed.she was resting her head on my chest.We spoke about random things and our plans for the future.We passed out i guess until my phone rang waking both of us up.Shit it was Rene RENE. It was after 7 when gran went to bed so i wore my tracksuits and went out..I took her phone along with me..When i got to Joe's gate i called him.At first he didnt answer but i called again and he answered. Joe: Hey Me: Hey can you please come out? Im at your place. Joe: uhm babe im at town with Chris. Me: Oh okay i will go back home then.i wanted us to talk. Joe: Keep the phone with you..i will call you when i am outside your place. Me: okay. Well that didnt go well..what a dissapointment. I turned and went back home..