Dad: I see you two are quite close.
Me: You mean Thuli and I?
He nodded and I smiled. She was really a blessing upon my life and a part of me hoped that she would never turn out fake.
Dad: I hope she doesn't hurt you in the end.
Me: I hope so too. She wants us to go to church.
Dad: I don't see anything wrong with that.
I raised my eyebrow and looked at him. There's everything wrong with church and it's people. They are too judgemental. We were judged because of simple things like the shoes we wore. So much for going to worship praise and worship God. Is that how God's people behave and act? Well I'd rather not be any part of such blasphemy.
Me: Don't start too. You don't even go to church.
Dad: You should blame yourself for that.
Dad: You know I can't go without you.
Me: Way to go dad.
He chuckled and parked his van in our yard. I got out with my bag and he unlocked the door.
Me: Did you cook?
Dad: I had quite a busy day.
Me: Alright let me change then cook.
He nodded and I went to the bedroom where I changed into a simple Tee and shorts then wore flipflops.
I cooked Rice with mince. I dished up for the both of us and we ate in front of the TV.
The following day I got up as usual and prepared myself for school. Good thing today I was wearing a skirt and golf shirt. Dad had bought stockings for me so I wore them too and wore school socks and shoes. I made only one bun with my hair took my bag then went to the kitchen.
Dad: Don't you want a phone?
Me: What will I do with a phone?
Dad: Teenagers your age already have phones.
Me: No thank you.
Dad: What do you want then?
Me: I don't know dad maybe some shoes.
Dad: Alright then.
We ate bread with butter and tea then he drove me to school.
Dad: You'll take a taxi today?
Tears crept up in my eyes and I looked at him pouting.
Dad: I'll come pick you up. I'll be a bit late though.
Me: How late?
Dad: An hour.
Me: I'll wait.
I kissed him on the cheek and got out after he gave me my lunch money. I was late this time. Late because the bell rang immediately after I entered the yard and I was really disappointed in myself. I quickly ran to my class because I wasn't about to go to the assembly with my bag. Thuli probably thought I was no longer coming to school but there was no way I'd be absent.
It's when I got back from assembly that I realized that she in fact was the one absent. This was going to be a long day for me I had gotten so used to having her around that I wondered how I was going to survive this day.
Nobuhle came to my table. Remember the mean girl who embarrassed me on the first day? The tall barbie doll? Her. I wondered what she wanted this time. I had no energy for her but unfortunately we in the same class.
Nobuhle: Khensani right?
I nodded. I don't even know how she knew my second name because everyone called me by my first.
She looked next to me Thuli's empty seat.
Nobuhle: I see your bodyguard is absent.
I just stared at her. I needed her to get to the point. The same point that was probably going to end with me in tears.
Nobuhle: You know I don't get why ugly bitches like you exist on earth.
There. There she goes insulting me I had done absolutely nothing to this girl except taking her seat which I had absolutely no idea belonged to her. Why did she have to insult me? Why did she have against me? I allowed her to have her way with words against me cause I had no power to fight her. How could I when she has the backing of the whole class? They cracked up in laughter like she had said a Trevor Noah joke.
Nobuhle: Wow so you not going to say anything?
The class laughed again.
Nobuhle: Oh I forgot she's always the one speaking.
She was pointing at Thuli's chair and my tears were on the verge of falling.
Nobuhle: See Khensani I'm 101% better looking than you
I'm 101% better looking than you I won't be brought down by your overweight ass.
After saying that she took her flat ass and catwalked to her seat. I could feel on the eyes that were on me. I just folded my arms on top of the table and bowed my head down. I couldn't let the tears fall not in front of the whole class.
I didn't even know why a girl like her would feel threatened by me.
When the bell rang I immediately ran to the toilets where I'd be able to burst out in tears freely with no fear of anyone seeing me. When I was satisfied I flashed then got out and washed my face in the sink. I didn't even have appetite. I went to sit where I normally sit with Thuli and just let my mind run wild.
It was even worse having to again wait for my father alone. I really missed Thuli and I didn't even know how I can reach her so I could know the reason behind her absence.
Now I really wish I had took up the offer of taking a taxi home cause this was really torture.
When I saw my father's car pulling up I immediately went to it and got inside without saying a word.
Dad: What's wrong?
I really didn't want to talk about. Good thing it was a Friday because if it wasn't I don't know how I could have been able to face my class again tomorrow. They probably all saw me as a joke. Nobuhle really had it going for me and I still wonder what wrong I had done to her I didn't even know her.
Dad: What did I do?
Me: Please just drive.
I sank back on my seat. I just wanted to go home and sleep I'd be able to forget about today's events for a few hours. It was a bad day for me. Sometimes I just felt like running away and never coming back.
I had tried suicide but death was something I was afraid of and I didn't want to go back I didn't want to go back to that dark place again.
I got out of the car after he parked. I went inside the house threw my bag on the bed and took off all my uniform and wore one of my father's old T-shirts which was like a dress to me and slept.
I was exhausted and sleep was one of the remedies that kept me sane.
When I woke up I found that Dad had cooked and I thanked my lucky stars because I was hungry I hadn't eaten at break because of Nobuhle whom I tried not to think about again.
I ate my food then decided to do my homeworks immediately because I wanted to have a lazy weekend.
I watched soapies after till I had to go to sleep.
Saturday I had absolutely no plans for the day but dad forced me to go to the city with him.
I'm saying he forced me because I didn't want to. I took a bath and wore my skinny jeans after with a golf shirt. I wore my All star sneakers and a cap on my head then we left.
Me: What are you going there for anyway?
Dad: Is it wrong to want us to spend time together away from home?
Me: But Dad we could have done this some other time.
Dad: There's no better time than the present baby.
I sighed and he drove over comfortable silence till we got at the city. There are so many shops buildings and offices at the CBD.
We started with his material and he also bought me some sneakers. I wanted Vans old Skool.
I was super excited when dad bought it for me and because of our low budget it's only what I got but I was more than happy. My father had done a lot for me and I was grateful for everything and each and every effort.
Dad: I'm going to church tomorrow.
Dad: Ain't you going with me?
Me: Me and God don't mix so nope.
Dad: I won't force you my baby.
Me: Since when do you go to church though?
Dad: Does it matter?
Me: I mean you've never been interested in church or this religion stuff.
He smiled between his teeth. Now dad was just being weird.
Me: What are you hiding?
Dad: You'd be surprised at how God can just touch your heart and change your life for the better.
Me: Please don't preach for me. I already hear enough from Thuli.
Dad: I like her.
Me: She's too young for you dad.
Dad: You know I don't mean it that way.
I laughed. I was just being silly.
Me: I know.
He had bought some takeaways which we ate when we got home.
I wonder what had inspired dad's new attitude towards church or God for that matter.